This bidet toilet seat accessory is the home throne I needed in my life

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I went to Taiwan for the first time to attend Computex in 2019, and when I was there, I was able to try a bidet for the first time. Before that, I had heard a ton of stories about how they are more hygienic than using toilet paper – and it really makes sense if you think about it for a few minutes – but this hotel bathroom exposed me to a whole new world.

I used the restroom after crossing a 16 hour plane ride from New York to Taipei, literally a week after I was hired as an editor at VPNOnlineFree. Needless to say, I was pretty exhausted. But, using this bidet made me feel completely refreshed.

Fast forward to the end of the conference, and I went back to New York, then to my home in Colorado, and I couldn't use a bidet for almost a year. I missed it every day – toilet paper somehow loses its appeal when you saw how good life can be.

So when Coway reached out and asked me if I wanted to try the BidetMega 400, there was no way I was going to refuse this. This is my story.

Computex Did More Than Just Show Me Some Fanciful RGB PC Components

Computex Did More Than Just Show Me Some Fanciful RGB PC Components (Image credit: VPNOnlineFree)

A bit about the Coway BidetMega 400

When I first heard that I would receive a bidet in the mail, my expectations were pretty tame. I just thought it would be a toilet seat with a hose running through it that would clean me after using the bathroom. I didn't know how luxurious the toilets could be.

The Coway BidetMega 400 is not just a bidet, it's a experience. Yes, it has the basic functionality of spraying water to clean, but it can do much more. The bidet stores water in a heated tank at one of three user-selected heat levels. This means that when you use the bidet, it’s not just chilled water sprayed on you, it’s heated and it smells unbelievable.

But it's not even all that is heated. You can also select one of the three heating levels for the seat, which would have been nice in winter, but that's it. However, even when the weather is moderately hot, as it is today, it is certain to be able to sit on a piece of hot plastic when I do my business.

The warm nature of the BidetMega 400 also includes a hair dryer, almost completely eliminating the need for toilet paper – although it's always good to make sure the bidet has, like, nothing missed. That's right, this stuff is really high-tech.

Finally, the BidetMega 400 has a creepy night light. Because the Covid-19 epidemic and the changing nature of the world prevented me from sleeping at night a bit, I used the toilet more in the middle of the night, and now my toilet lights up the toilet in that nice light blue so I don't have to blind myself by turning on the lights. Honestly, at this point, I don't think I can live without it – it even cleans itself automatically whenever it detects someone is sitting on it.

I'm in love.

The night light is really cool

The night light is really cool (Image credit: Coway)

Take one bidet at a time

Now, of course, the world is sort of a strange place right now. I'm not an expert on just about anything except processors and ray tracing (and even that is questionable), but I can speak from my own personal experience.

The Rite Aid in my apartment was sold just about any paper product for about 6 weeks, and I had to refresh my stock of toilet paper and paper towels while going to the little bodega in my corner – and it really does have single-ply toilet paper on offer. It definitely does the job, but it's not a way of life.

This bidet arrived just in time, really – I don't have to worry about fighting the crowd to get hold of toilet paper, and I don't have to sacrifice hygiene to avoid it. I have been using the Coway BidetMega 400 for about three weeks at this point, and although I recognize the privilege of having such a luxurious hygiene product in today's climate, I couldn't be more grateful.

It's to the point where I legitimately in a hurry to use the bathroom. I feel so refreshed and clean afterwards, without really risking touching my own waste. It's a bit of a pain to clean, and installing the bidet in a tiny New York apartment was a bit of a chore, but I would do it all over again.

The hour of work it took to set it up early on a Saturday morning was nothing compared to the weeks of comfort I experienced as a result. Faced with this pandemic, we are all subject to so much stress, but the BidetMega 400 is the creature comfort that I needed in these hectic times.

The world will probably return to normal, but at the end of the day, I don't think I go. It will probably take a long time before I am emotionally and mentally ready to handle the crowds again. The silver lining in all of this is that it gave me the opportunity to have a bidet in my life, and even when everything else comes back to what it was before, I will never come back to experience a life without bidet. It is really good.

I went ahead and included some links to buy a bidet below. If you have the opportunity, I recommend it without reservation, whatever the brand.

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